Mafia Wars

Ok, so I have a confession.

I'm a little bit obsessed with Mafia Wars on Facebook. I'm pretty sure it is what has been taking up all my extra time and keeping me from blogging. Damn Mafia Wars.

But there is just something so exciting about knowing I have just kicked the poo out of some guy with the mafia title Imgonakickyurazz and there is nothing he can do about it. Plus, I like the idea of waking up each morning to 200 million dollars in income from owning skeevy rent houses and about 50 mega casinos.

The closest thing I get to that kind of morbid excitement in my real life is telling customers that their credit card has been declined and waking up every other Friday to my paycheck actually being in the bank.

So what would it be like if I were head of my own mafia? I guess I would start by doing more practical things than just stealing money and blackmailing state representatives. Maybe I would knock over a Kate Spade store for some wicked awesome shoes and accessories. Or whack whatever celebrity gets on my nerves that week. I would even have a cool calling card, maybe a Yorkie paw print on the forehead of everyone I have iced. And every time you see a picture of me, I'm wearing a black Chanel dress with a black Prada bag carrying my faithful pup who wears a signature custom made Ralph Lauren bow tie.

Ah, the mafia life would be sweet.

Note to Self: Start with finding the Chanel dress.

Proof

Okay, so yeah it's been a month since I posted.

But I seriously do have a photo to prove what I have been doing with my time...

Yeah, I got married, just like my last post said (and you thought I was just using some lame excuse). And so I have been spending my time being a good Mrs. Cop, setting up house, working my life away, and cleaning Kevlar vests... you know, normal wife things.

I've been procrastinating writing again, I think because I am afraid I will disappoint again - going away for another month without writing, while you all sit on the edge of your seats waiting for the next awesome post (that's what you're doing right?). And look at me, I still haven't made my rounds to all my normal blog haunts.

Even so, even without all the Pulitzer worthy writing, I received a nice award in my absence from Peter Parkour over at Hate and Anger.

It's a nice little tribute to me for hounding him for not blogging. Kinda ironic right?

Anywho, I have so many daily things where I still think, oh I should blog about that, and yet I don't. I should. And I should make it around to reading you guys and commenting again.

I just finished up a small project for the National Police Wives Association. When it gets printed, you guys will be the first to know. For now, I hope to make it back very soon (at least this week), if for no other reason than to bring you some good Note to Idiots. I mean, retail during the Christmas season makes for plenty of writing material, so I know I really have no excuse anymore.

Hang in there.

Note to Self: Add this award to the award page...

AND...

Today is my wedding day!

Note to Self: Don't trip!

Weddings (and other such wackiness)...

Yep, I'm getting married in less than two weeks (11 days to be exact), and the stress is kicking in double-time. I have to make sure the whos-its are on time and the whats-its are where they are supposed to be and the why-nows are paid on time.

Juggling it all has been a bit of a challenge (especially since I was never good at juggling), but I am making it through as long as nothing else gets piled on...

Like the promotion... THAT I GOT. Heck yes. Oh dang.

So my schedule is totally thrown for a loop these days, mandating that I spend more time at work (y'know, making more money) and spend the rest of my time either sleeping or coordinating the whos-its, whats-its, and why-nows.

I miss my writing. I miss my bloggy friends. But I also very much miss the cop, and I can't wait to spend all my extra time with him soon. So hang in there, dear commenters. I hope to be back to some better semblance of my former self in the near, not-so-busy future.

Note to Self: Write down new ideas for Note to Idiot posts... retail is practically a gold mine for them...

All About the Job

So these past few months have been super-hectic working out the whole lay-off thing and emotionally swinging my Louisville Slugger in a new career direction: retail.

This past week, I went and interviewed with the district manager for our stores to try and get a promotion into an entry management position that just came open in my store. The interview went well, and I'm hoping to hear something about it early this coming week. Cross your fingers for a promotion (and a pay raise, woohoo!).

Speaking of jobs, the cop is finding himself more and more beat down these days with crazy calls, rude people, and desperate criminals. I even saw a bumper sticker in town today that summed it all up: "Crime Doesn't Pay. And Neither Does Our Police Department."

He recently visited the site of the killing of a fellow officer and was overcome with emotion - mostly rage. I hated to hear him so angry about something, but I understood where it was coming from. He said he could see where the officer had been shot through the door. He could see that the drug dealer who shot him had obviously been crouching down, hiding, like a coward, because of the way the bullet came through the door. It also showed great restraint, I think, that the officers standing behind their fallen comrade did not shoot the bastard.

I think sometimes even I don't give these guys enough credit for the restraint they often show in their line of work. Because seriously, I couldn't do it. The first woman whose infant child I found out of a car seat in a moving vehicle would become the object of a serious bitch-slapping. I'm pretty sure I would be in jail, especially since car seat violations are the least of their worries as officers.

In closing, I give you a little bit of Paul Harvey:



Note to Self: Kiss the cop regularly. Remind him he does a good job that no one else is willing to do.

Bridezilla

So, I consider myself a rather picky person when it comes to my wedding planning. All of my vendors, however, have delightfully told me how wonderful and easy I have been compared to other brides.

I just have to wonder what the other brides are like? What exactly is it that they demand that I'm missing out on? I have to wonder.
When it comes to wedding planning, I don't think I have ever done anything more stressful, yet fulfilling, in my life thus far. Sad, I know, but it has a been a lot of fun. I have enjoyed shopping with my bridesmaids, picking out their gifts, and ordering all the little things like my cake topper and garters. And I am super-excited about the shower my Maid-of-Honor is throwing me.

I couldn't imagine being a total bitch about my big day. Although I am quite opinionated about what I want, none of it is worth making people frustrated or angry with me.

Like I couldn't imagine being THESE women:

Sheesh!

Note to Self: I mean, is demanding that every bridesmaid have matching hair color so much to ask! Gah!... Just kidding.

Actually, what's funny about that - I have a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead for bridemaids... Sounds like the beginning to a bad joke.

Priorities

In the cop's line of work, it's easy to become very cynical about the world and humanity in general. Me, I like to make fun of the majority of mankind and its generally high level of stupidity.

With that, I am going to start a new series called "Pryorateez" to show you just how screwed up and backwards some people can be.

Since this is my first one, I actually have a photo for you for illustration purposes. I don't think I'll even really need to explain it much.

Yes. That is a custom painted truck on rims... parked in front of a government project house. There are many more like these, and I will make sure to bring them to your attention.

I sleep easily knowing that someone who is getting my tax money can live well enough to afford that, even though they can't pay their own damn rent or mortgage. It just makes me feel great about life.

Note to Self: I personally would have gone with bass boat blue, but that's just me.

Back By Popular Demand!

Note to Self is back online!

Whew! So let me give you a quick update on the complete craziness that is my life. And just for old time sake, let's make it a top ten list! So I give you...

The Top 10 Crazy Things That Have Happened to MJ

(10) We finally got into the house, and FINALLY got our internet up and running.
(9) I have acquired a taste for red wine, especially old vine zin. I blame this on my fellow police wives.
(8) I went and saw Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. (Side note: meh.)
(7) I have gotten settled into my new job as a retail sales associate, and I think I am liking it a little too much.
(6) The cop's benefits have been taken away, given back, taken away, and then partly given back. The city has seriously been jerking us around.
(5) Panther is still a brat, and now he has a big brat brother in the house to conspire against us with.
(4) I have just passed the two-months-left-to-go mark for our wedding, and I am realizing how much still needs to be done. Ack.
(3) However, my bachelorette party has been completely planned for months, reservations and all.
(2) I finally finished my Masters in Business (with honors) and am readily awaiting the arrival of another worthless piece of very expensive paper to hang on the office wall.

aaaand....
(1) My mother, my rock, was diagnosed with (luckily) early stage breast cancer and is awaiting the results so they can recommend treatment.

That last one is a bit of a mood killer, but I thought you had the right to know what has kept me so long from you, my loyal fans and friends.

You shall be my (hopefully, regular) outlet over the next few weeks as I recover from the majority of these events and move into a more bright and glorious future. Well, bright and glorious when seen through a glass tinted with red wine... because it's turned up... and I'm drinking it... ALL of it.

I do have to say thank you to all of you who left messages here, sent me email messages, posted on my facebook, and stalked me in other places on the web. I have missed you. I hope to get around to my fellow bloggers soon!

Note to Self: I have so many things to write about! What do I choose first?

Note to Readers

I have not abandoned you! I promise!

The cop and I purchased a home last week, and we have not gotten our Internet up yet. (I know, I'm going nuts. I need to hurry up...) I miss all of my blogospohere friends sooo much, and I know I am losing readers every day I go without writing.

I am even sitting here in the middle of my MBA class writing this, because it is the only place I get Internet (besides Barnes n Noble). That's serious dedication - putting aside my expensive education to update you.

I hope things are going well with all of you. How about you stop by in the comments and leave me a little life update, so I can be in the know.

Hope to be back soon!

MJ

Ode to Mom

Mom.
The woman who taught me the joy of heels.
The woman who held my hair whenever I puked.
The woman I fought with over the shortness of skirts.
The woman I inherited perfect balance and blonde hair from.
The woman who has put up with my bullshit for almost 24 years.
Mom.

You're the best.
Happy Birthday!

Note to Self: Love you!